I had a frustrating doctor’s appointment last week and I have been thinking a lot about it. I was expressing (ok I was whining about) my frustration with not being able to lose weight and let’s just say my doctor’s response was not really what I wanted to hear.
First, let’s recap some of the bigger changes I’ve made in my life since the beginning of the year:
- I no longer eat fast food (very rare occasions, like when traveling).
- I rarely eat bread or tortillas or chips or potatoes or crackers or other “empty” carbs.
- I don’t drink sodas. Once a week I allow myself one diet soda.
- I eat at least one fruit and/or vegetable with each meal.
- I work out 5-6 times a week.
- I lift weights 3 times a week.
- I drink water like it’s going out of style — at least 100 oz a day.
- I never eat after dinner.
- I rarely eat a snack, and when I do it’s only once a day and I keep it around 100 calories and usually a protein and/or a fruit or veggie.
- I don’t even use a regular dinner plate any more. All of my meals fit on a “side dish” plate.
Yet…. in the past 8 months, I have managed to lose 0 pounds. Nothing. I’m the same weight I was after my 10-pound Christmas & New Year’s bingefest. Does anyone else feel like that’s really messed up?
So I was explaining this all to my doctor and he does want to do some blood tests to make sure my hormones aren’t out of whack (which I’m pretty sure they are), but he said even if it’s my hormones, or even if they were able to diagnose me with some sort of “problem”…. the fact remains that this is just my lot in life and if I do want to get down to some sort of “goal weight,” I have a very long road ahead of me.
Basically his message was to stop having a pity party for myself and just accept that this is my life now. Regardless of what the scale says, I am a healthier person because of my new diet and exercise regimen. He said I need to “find joy” in eating right and exercising and just be happy with my new lifestyle. It might not be fair that others can lose weight faster and easier, but that’s the way it is. I need to accept it or I’m going to stress myself out and make it even harder to lose weight.
Wow. Not what I wanted to hear. No, I don’t know exactly what I wanted to hear, but I do know it wasn’t that!
So I’m just supposed to be happy being stuck at 198 pounds? Really? I’m supposed to find joy in working my butt off, journaling every morsel of food I put into my mouth, working out every day, constantly planning and preparing healthy meals, etc… for no results? I’m sorry, but that is crap!
He told me I was obsessing over the number on the scale. That I needed to stop looking at the number and just be happy with the other benefits I’m seeing and feeling. Don’t I have more energy? Don’t I feel stronger? Don’t I have more physical endurance?
Well yes… I can say definitely say “yes” to all of those questions, but I have some questions, too. Don’t I deserve to be able to run and work out without lugging around an extra 30-40 pounds? Don’t I deserve to be able to weigh in at the doctor’s office and not be categorized as obese or overweight? Don’t I deserve to be able to wear clothes without worrying about my bulges showing? Don’t I deserve to be an “After”?
Sure, with a lot of work I can probably figure out a way to trick my mind into being “happy” with the progress I’ve made so far, but I don’t think I’m asking too much to just be at a healthy weight. I’ve been working at this for a very long time now.
Very very frustrated.